Chandra from More Modern Modesty, or MoMoMod, invited me to do a guest post on her blog. She specifically wanted me to write a post with a “philosophical” context. She came to the right person, but I hope to not bore you with my usual novel-length musings within this requested category! Below is the original post I wrote for her site:
I started my blog, à la Modest, not to put up a righteous tone and prove that the way other people dress is wrong, but as a product of my need to express the new awakening in me of a desire to dress modestly. Neither my history nor my background predisposed me to dress the way I do now. My sense of style started out rather immodest, as I was always wanting to flaunt and attract just about everybody’s attention. Unbeknownst to anyone, I was engulfed by the darkness of insecurity. I fought and lost battles to achieve what I was lusting after—a certain look that I could never achieve, a status quo that I should never have been reaching for, and a desire from men that I should never have stolen. I can not even begin to describe how these things destroyed the way I lived and viewed life. I became dangerously anorexic wanting to achieve that model figure, dressed like typical MTV pop stars just to be like everyone else, and gave the wrong guys the time of day—all with the purpose of fulfilling that longing for love and appreciation.
Thankfully, God swept me away from all of that. He kept me physically pure after all those years, always nudging me back to His love before I lost myself completely. He provided me with an amazing husband who played a big part in my decision to dress modestly. Even though I was already informed of how certain clothes seduced men, it didn’t really stick in my brain or my heart as something immediate and of high importance until I heard it from someone I loved dearly. Isn’t that true for most of us—that we truly learn from experience and personal contact and not just through books or sermons? I did not deserve such a gift, or such mercy, but neither really does anyone else. God knew I needed Him so badly, because I cried out to Him day and night for some miraculous resolution in my shattered mind.
You’d think that marriage would have solved my insecurity, but you might think differently if you really considered how it exposes oneself to one person completely in all aspects, including physically and behaviorally. It did play a significant part in my healing process to know that someone loved me unconditionally, but being married to my husband did not solve my problem completely. God’s powerful intervention did. The combination of marriage, modesty values, and a sense of joyous satisfaction in my own body was what He brought to my life. I wish I had grasped the virtue of these things much earlier! It would have saved me from so much trouble. God was always knocking on my door, and I listened to everything else except His urging to give up the way I dressed. Clothing-wise, I was always rebelliously stubborn and cared way too much about having total control of the way I dressed. If I were to be faithful to both God and my husband, shouldn’t I have easily given up tight jeans and low-cut shirts? I made my own stand. I chose modesty.
This decision did not just change my choice of clothing. It changed my heart, my mind, and my actions. There was never anything I was so passionate about until I learned the importance of dressing modestly. I became very sensitive to how men’s minds work through the help of my husband and other men online, offline, and on paper. Women know fashion, but most of us do not really know too much about men’s deepest struggles.
My goal for à la Modest is to bridge this gap by showing other ladies how I manage to be stylish while being covered up. I do not just post photos of what I wear, but I also write about modest philosophies based on the Bible and the psychology of the sexes. I also share other things that I personally enjoy such as art, music, and movies, pulling out from them noteworthy and modest fashion inspirations!
So, hop on over to alamodest.com and say hi! I am not one to judge or criticize. I love all people—both men and women! My blog is not just about me, and it’s not just a fashion site. It’s for everyone!
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