The Necessity of Restriction (and Ranting)

As most of you have already noticed, being a modesty blogger, I don’t really talk much about the problems I see everywhere with sexuality as much as I talk about what inspires me in my clothing. If you highly doubt that I am not aware of these problems, because I have built my entire blog around sexual purity in clothing, then you are correct. I have all my writings on my philosophy grouped in a section of my blog, and I only bring it up once in a while. There is so much going on with promiscuity all over the world that if I blogged about everything that bothered me, it would just be very depressing and very negative. I’m so aware of these things all around me that I honestly rarely read anything that talks about modesty for modesty’s sake, but instead I choose to ponder on things that give me inspiration such as the beauty that I find in untapped resources in music and in film. There really is nothing wrong with reading about the dangers of carelessness in clothing as it relates to lust and self preservation, especially if you are still unsure about the decision, want to be encouraged, or want to teach others about it. Although, I am at a point where my senses have been so incredibly heightened to the specific problem of sexual impurity all around me, that I believe it is not doing me much good to dwell on the problems themselves. The good thing that resulted from my sensitivity to this matter is that this blog was created and has hopefully inspired many to pursue a more attractive presentation of modesty to others who might not understand. In my personal life, this sensitivity has caused me unnecessary pain, but it has thankfully allowed me to be a vessel of some sort to shed light on this issue. In all honesty, often times I wish that I weren’t so sensitive to my concerns. It has been both a blessing and a curse to feel so strongly against impurity.

Despite my saying of avoiding negative talk, I am going to, at least for this post, address some things that have been on my mind lately and present the following in a more constructive manner to the best of my abilities:

  • Commercials that should cause commotion – If you have not seen the latest Tide with Acti-Lift Detergent “Too Short” commercial, you may view it on YouTube. While searching for the video link, I also stumbled upon an ethics site that discussed whether the message was or not ethical in nature—to which most concluded that the  commercial was nothing too unethical to note. Although not at all pornographic, the subtle message of this commercial screams “Dad, you’re an old fart who can’t appreciate my choice to wear mini skirts. Mom, you’re the best for trying to side with me!” To the pro-choice feminist, this commercial is to be raved about. It celebrates putting down the actions of the male head of the house, the father. It rejoices in the individual expression of the tween to wear whatever she likes, with the other female (the mother) supporting her. To the true “feminist” supporting femininity and modesty, this commercial does just the opposite in her viewpoint. Although I have to admit I never enjoyed when one of my parents (especially both) told me what I couldn’t wear, I do see now that some of the choices I made back then weren’t very wise. I can still argue that some of the things they didn’t want me to put on were probably just a matter of distaste in preference over morality. The immoral side of my wardrobe then, though, I do agree was just a stumbling block to my self-dignity as well as to the minds of the men around me. As for my preference for wearing some conspicuous pieces for my safe self-expression, I would still wear the majority to do this day with no bones about it. As subtle as the Tide commercial is, it is still harmful for young girls to garner the wrong strength from this misleading advertisement. Even though I must say there are much more blatant commercials out there with visual sexual content in them, that still doesn’t make this commercial okay.
  • Strategically placing enticing content – Although I have not confirmed this, my friend Imon pointed out to me that Victoria’s Secret’s stores are always placed in the first floor of malls where all the men or unisex stores are placed. Why not place the lingerie store where all the women’s clothes are? I can only assume that it was strategically placed where it is now to be seen by men in hopes of buying stuff for their women while looking at other women’s boobs. A very similar commercial strategy is used to entice grocery shoppers to buy the last minute useless magazines, junk, and batteries displayed next to the counter—stuff that would otherwise be forgotten if they weren’t there. I think displaying candy and beef jerky where they are visible is okay, but displaying  eye candy of almost naked bodies and beefy jerks isn’t. Also, can the commercial cops at least (if it cannot be eradicated) please have the unavoidable TV commercials, street ads, and magazine covers be grouped in the mature-only section where they are harder to access and cannot be freely seen by avoiding eyes including faithful men and innocent children? If you are interested in reading about what I wrote about magazines, you may view it in my post, “Are You a Cosmo Girl or a Kosmios Girl?
  • Changes in movie ratings over time – For some of you who may not know, the rating PG13 was a recent addition to the movie rating categories. It enabled the display of nudity in a non-sexual context. Tell me, if a bodacious woman were to stand still in the middle of the room without doing anything in front of a thirteen-year-old boy in all his raging hormones, would that kid not be sexually enticed? I still believe that nudity, partial or full, should effect an R rating in any movie. I am glad though that the ratings have been much improved throughout the years. Movies such as  Clash of the Titans (1981) and Sixteen Candles (1984)  had full frontal female nudity and were only rated PG. Chaplin (1992), as an example of a loose PG13 rating, had constant full frontal female nudity as well. While the ratings have been improved throughout movie-rating evolution, what is okay to display as far as sexuality has become much looser. The movies I have listed here and many others that have sexual content in them are still awesome movies in my opinion, but I think they did not need all that sexuality in them. Great directors and stories should speak for themselves without having to use sex to sell.
  • Unrealistic women’s combat and winter outfits (and bodies)- You see women dressed in bikinis or scant clothing in action movies and games, but is this picture realistic? Wouldn’t these women not want to be bruised and scraped easily by covering it up with some kind of metal instead of exposing their skin? One of the very few women in video games who actually wears full armor, although not entirely fool proof as some of you Metroid gamers might know, is Samus from Metroid. I don’t know about you, but I love my skin too much to want to see it scabbed when I can just cover it up with more clothing easily. One of the reasons I did not learn how to bike properly as a kid (but was good at swimming and enjoyed hiking) was because I told myself that I would rather drown swimming than see my legs and arms have scabs from possibly falling off a bike. Although that was just a completely silly notion, it does make sense for someone to want to have her body safe during physical activities. This same annoyance comes to me when women dress like it’s summertime in the cold. I for one was known to dress like that in high school, but now I admit, that was just stupid. As for female animation characters with size E (for enlarged) chests and long Jack Skellington legs, haven’t we already expressed our childhood disappointments with Barbie’s unattainable and abnormal body? It’s not realistic. Men can work out to grow muscles, but what does this depiction encourage women to do—get cosmetic surgery?
  • Safe” web browsing isn’t really safe- Even with internet filter software or even just Web site–built filters, surfing on the Web is never safe, especially for sexual content. I advise you to tell men who want to fight for purity not to use Google images to search for pictures of anything. A search for the most innocent thing you have in mind will almost always have an unrelated image(s) of naked bodies. If guys need to look up images, use another search engine to do this or just use the regular search box (not images) to look for them. Youtube also has unrelated videos show up with obscene thumbnails with your currently viewed video, but what to do about it is unbeknownst to me, because Youtube is the happenin’ place to view Internet videos. I would suggest having the males view Youtube with someone else to decrease temptation. For everyone else, Youtube, I must vouch, can be a total time-waster if you just stay there without a goal of what you want to see in mind.
  • Restrictions aren’t only for children- Although my husband and I are customers of the wonderful ClearPlay technology that can be set to skip questionable scenes in movies through its customizable filters, the way the Web site or even the staff present itself—at least as it seemed from my correspondence with an employee—implied that the restriction it has created through the use of this video player was for parents who have children. My husband and I—although we’re planning to have children—and our couple friends who recommended us the player do not have little ones, and we need it for ourselves. The product is clearly being used by us married couples to help keep our minds pure and focused on developing and expressing sexuality only to our mates. Obviously, avoiding movies isn’t the answer to outer-marital lust, but it does help somewhat not to have those uncalled for sexy images lingering in our heads. Even with that said, I wouldn’t just say that ClearPlay and all the other filters out there are for families and married couples. I believe that restrictions should be placed on everyone wanting to lead a pure thought life. Single men especially are as prone if not more prone to impurity in their thought life as married men (or even single or married women).

These are just some of the things that have been on my mind lately, and some of them are so important not to ignore that I might just write a separate post about them. I kept these in bullet form to give you just a quick glance at some of the problems with sexuality that need to be worked on. Restriction and boundaries are absolutely necessary in my opinion for a human’s well-being. Some I’m sure will argue that curtailing certain things for ourselves doesn’t give us a good picture of the world, but that is not considering how some things actually harm us. From a scientific and societal view point, isn’t that where what we call evolution brought us—removing things that cause us harm to build a better self? We can but shouldn’t engage in everything. Paul said in 1 Corinthians 10:23 says that everything is permissible, yes, but not everything is beneficial to us. I can relate the problem of sexuality to the problem of obesity through this passage. It just makes sense.

This post has been rated R for ranting, and it has ended. For now.