body type

Ashton Kutcher’s “Sexy” Speech

I believe I now have two pairs of high waisted skirts that go below the knee and two high waisted pants. I think I want to slowly eliminate my low waist jeans and skirts when I can, because 1) it’s hard not to keep my back and undies from showing when I bend over, 2) high waisted bottoms make anyone look taller, and 3) they’re retro!

High waist anything doesn’t necessarily make you slender, so keep that in mind. It can play up existing curves but also make you look much bigger around the tush! Think of SNL’s “mom jeans.” It really is great for any body type, but it will make the pear shaped body look more pear shaped, which is not what most pears want. Although I am a pear myself, I still like high waist pants and skirts for the reasons I mentioned above.

On another note, have you all seen Ashton Kutcher’s speech at the teen choice award this year? It really took me by surprise. Since it didn’t win Video of the Day on Hannity’s show, I will put it up here. Listen and learn, young readers. Sexiness is about being smart.

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Stay Away From My Bees-Knees

beesknees

What length of skirt or dress have you been wearing most often? I find myself at least wanting a lot of dresses below the knee more often than ever. Sure it’s a must for modesty, but I honestly think skirts and dresses below the knee look better, especially on a person with a pear-shaped/hourglass body like me and the majority of women after the 1920s body shape shift.

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Body Shape Diagram Sham


Just so you know, this isn’t going to be a body shape 101 post. I am assuming you already know what you are or have.

You know how ridiculously unflattering some of these body shape diagrams are? I mean, instead of making you love your own body, those actually make you feel sick inside. And we’re expected to love our own bodies? The above picture is a fairly acceptable representation of the different bodies. Below however, might apply to some apples and pears but discounting all the other skinnier apples and all the other ample breasted pears. So when you think back and look at all the other body types, you immediately think that they’re all imperfect and even disgusting except the hourglass.

But I guess they have placed women with smaller breasts and big hips in the category of a “spoon” or a “triangle”—adequately diversifying the pear-shaped woman and helping the pears with ample bossoms and slightly wider nice child-bearing hips (the classic woman shape) find their niche in this modern bananas world. Thus, they have made alternate versions of the body type diagram to represent us all better—just like how the diagram deus corrected the food pyramid that once forced us all to eat mostly those killer carbs. Okay, so maybe the rest of us non-hourglass-shaped women are just in denial. However, some of the physically coveted and gorgeous women out there aren’t exactly hourglass. (I won’t name the celebrities. I’m sure some of you can just do a Google search on that…or not, if you’re like me and don’t give a flippin flop about that kind of thing unless those people have changed my life somehow.)

I am a pear but not skinny on top. What are you?

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