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Eye Spy Spy Clothing!

June 18th, 2013

emmapeel-alamodest-spy

What better femme fatale to feature for spy clothing than Emma Peel from the 1960s TV show The Avengers! Contrary to what most people think about the good ole’ days though, there were a lot of risque and scandalous clothing before now. The Avengers was not at all what you’d call sexploitation, but it was around the time when women unilaterally didn’t get all up and arms about women’s rights and equality. That was up until the women’s liberation movement of second wave feminism came along in the late 60s and early 70s. Before all that, men easily got away with using women’s bodies to sell movies and to make women believe that their powers reside in their sexuality. Women have brains as much as breasts, muscles as much as… men-struation? Yes, oh so sexy.

Setting aside geeky alliteration, here are some things I came across the web that deserve some attention, good or bad.  All these are great for a well-covered feminist spy who carries around gadgets instead of lingerie for a change to save the world. I am a lingerie addict, but I can’t pretend that it does any good outside the bedroom.

scottevest-trench-coat-spy En-trenched with this trench coat. I complain about how women’s clothes are lacking in pockets, but that’s what purses are for, right? Then again, it could just be a massive conspiracy where women’s clothing designers intentionally don’t add pockets so that they can sell more bags. Check out this trench coat by Scottevest. It has 18 pockets?! They have a whole line of TEC (technology-enabled clothing) that is perfect for a spy. Oh, and I spy Amy Tan sporting the coat on their website!

elizabethannboots-spy

A Purse and a Boot, to Boot! Elizabeth Anne’s The European boot looks like an ordinary boot from the outside, but take a close look at the interior. This Canadian designer made the “The World’s First Purse For Your Feet.” I could see an Emma Peel in this decade wearing these as she whips out a credit card to pay for her purchases and picks up her cellphone to make a call. I’ve seen a lot of crazy fashion ideas out there, but this one seems not too far fetched from sanity. Femme fatales have been hiding knives and guns in their shoe and garter belts, pretending like they’ve obviously got nothing to hide in their skintight clothing. Oh, looks can be deceiving.

zoomies-spy

Zoom-ba! I recently saw a commercial for Zoomies on TV, and I immediately gave it the same creepiness factor as the Snuggies commercial. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my Snuggie. It’s an odd-looking thing, but its use is so practical. Zoomies may be very useful, but they do open up a can of worms for predators. Snuggies however do not, but perhaps another person can argue otherwise.

When it comes to decisions on clothing and accessories though, I  do succumb to aesthetics over practicality almost every time. I know some people may frown upon that, but dressing up can be and is an art form for some of us. If we were to supposed to wear the most practical pants, then we’d be all wearing cargo pants. I wore cargos in the 90s, and although I really liked them at the time, I may not ever go back.

My point in this post is this— there’s nothing wrong with “impractical” clothing if you see it as beautiful. However, if you’re going to try to kick butt, make sure you do so through “practical” skills and not your body.

P.S. Thank you for choosing me as one of your top 25 political and feminist blogs in June 2013! I’m not going to take this TOO seriously for two reasons. One, I haven’t written anything on point in a while. Two, I was ahead of Michelle Malkin by two points.

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